was a nerve-wrecking experience.

the thought of having a big needle poke through me, into the womb and extracting cells from the placenta was scary. It wasn’t the pain, it was the procedure. the other thought about the risk of miscarriage was the other scary factor. ok. and the fact that my odd were 1/17 (from the oscars test) made me really really freaked out.

after having decided to go for it on monday and tried calling my gynae a few times to inform him but i only managed to talk to the busy man in the evening (7pm+). what happened next was in a whizz.

tuesday morning. i was in a meeting when my gynae called. he didnt manage to get me a slot for wednesday, because it was so last minute, and the slots were full, plus thursday was a PH. the following week was too late. i was already into my 13th week and the following week would be 14th week and the baby will be too big. The CVS are usually done between 11-13weeks. he only had at slot for me on the same day at 1pm. I was already 10.20am when i got the call.

i called hubby, texted my colleague who is my buddy at work to tell her about it, text my boss that i needed to leave urgently for a medical procedure (i didnt tell anyone else about the pregnancy and what i was going through), took off from the meeting and went back to my desk to clear as much as i could and did a quick handover to my colleague and off i went to TMC.

told you its nerve wrecking.

i reached at 1pm, met the husband at the hospital (poor him, had to settle his work matters and rushed all the way back from johor), registered myself, and waited.. both of us a bunch of nerves. i emptied my bladder and the lady told me to drink 4 cups of water because a full bladder was required for the procedure.

it was a really bad piece of advice. at least for me.

my bladder got so full before it was my turn and i was holding my pee back real bad. we went through a briefing session with a staff nurse (oh, i didnt get her name but i love her loads). she was very reassuring, knowledgeable, answered all our questions that we had and gave me some sense of calm amidst everything. we waited for a sonographer next to scan the position of the baby to ensure everything is in order before the procedure.

by then.. i was dying… from holding my pee. it got to the point where i feel pain in my bladder but i couldn’t empty it!

when my name was called, hubby had to stay outside. i went into the room where the staff nurse was there and one other nurse, the sonographer and the doctor. did another scan, baby was in position, placenta was in position, bladder was full, everything is good. each time the sonographer scanned the baby and showed it to me, my head was feel with morbid thoughts about not being able to keep it, and wondering to myself if i’ll ever have the chance to watch it grow. each time these thoughts flood my mind, my eyes starts to sting.

the doctor administered the local anesthesia, and told me to look away if i feel uncomfortable. i didnt, and thought the needle looked normal. on boy, how wrong i was. that was just the needle for the anesthesia. the next needle was a much thicker one, one with a hollow center for a finer needle to go through in the center. that went in as well and it was a weird sensation. i could feel the pressure against my skin and the pain was coming from the insides when it poked through the placenta. The needle was then left in my stomach with the ultrasound constantly eyeing the needle position and the baby. the doc then fished out a very fine needle about 30cm long (i could be wrong in my estimation) and poke it through to extract the cells from the placenta.

but. but. before the doctor extracted anything. he pulled the needled out and checked the baby and the placenta through the ultrasound. and guess what? my bladder was way too full and pushing the baby around so… the position moved and he had to repeat the procedure again.

pulled out needle. find position of placenta. determine that the baby didnt move for the next few minutes. administered anesthesia again (at a different spot). the pain from insides as the thicker needle went through.

gosh. what people went through once, i had to go through TWICE. Boo. and all this time, the staff nurse very gently patted me like a baby on my hands that were placed on my chest. seriously, if not for the grave situation that i was in, i would have giggled at her kindness.

this time round, i tried to relax so that my bladder will not push the baby around anymore and the doc managed to extract the cells. he repeated the procedure 4 times, each time checking the contents of extraction through a torchlight, which i thought was rather interesting. when he had ascertained that he needed all the samples required, i was given the clear and needle was taken out of me.

i had to rest on the bed for 5 mins and not move. after which, i had to roll to my side to get out of the bed so as not to stress the tummy. outside, i had to sit and bum around for 30mins before i could leave, but not before the nurse checking to see if i was ok. i had to keep playing iphone games to distract myself while the husband surfed around for hotel deals to pass time.

we paid up (the bill was shockingly 1.7k of which i paid a few hundreds for express reporting within 3 days), collected the medication, took a light lunch and headed home to pack for hotel stay.

while i was afraid of the risk of miscarriage, i think i was more freaked out by the unknown of whether the baby is ok and whether we’ll be able to keep it.

i know. i know. we can choose to keep a baby with down syndrome as well, but judging on a lot of factors (family support, financials, jerry and how he will have to cope in the future, and the other complications that could potentially come along), we entertained the thoughts of an abortion even though we did not finalize our decision.

so, when i got the much awaited call on wednesday evening at 6pm from my gynae declaring everything was clear… i was sooooooo soooooo relieved and happy! i was also especially thrilled that the test result came back much faster than i anticipated it to be, so all is good! now, i just need to keep my fingers crossed and be real careful to reduce the probability of a miscarriage.