while i was fiddling with my desktop and searching through some really old files and pictures.. i took a glimpse of the person i am in the past.

through all those pictures, i saw a confident me. someone who live life to the fullest, who doesn’t really think what the world thinks of her.. someone who is determined, know what she wants in life and having a whale of a time.

now, i think about the person i am.. and i think i feel like a puddle of shit. i no longer know what i want.. i query myself about the kind of job i am in and if i REALLY like it, or that if it REALLY suits me. i ask myself why i seemed to be down in luck in almost everything. my pay sucks, my job sucks, my life sucks to a certain extent too if you asked me. right, i know it has got to do with attitude. but i cannot seemed to get myself out of this rut.

have it got to do with confidence level? while i earned peanuts in the past, and know nuts about everything else.. i am more at ease at myself. now, i feel as if i am a piece of puzzle that doesn’t fit into the world i am and that im constantly struggling to keep up some times.


doesn’t matter. i just needed to rant anyway.

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