last nite, i suddenly went through a bout of depression. my morale took a plunge and i was feeling really miserable. i didnt know why, but i feel so unworthy. it’s like, being 25 years old and nothing to my name. no achievements, no money, no nothing, with a job that’s going no where.

and when i tried calling wei up to seek some comforting words, i didnt get any. he was busy sorting out his bills and making bills payment online since he just got his virus-infected com up and running. i got sore and turned into a bitch, ignored his conversation (ramblings mostly) and hung up the phone, sobbing right after while hugging my going to be tattered but faithful orangey doggy plush. holding it, we both plunged into the depths of misery.

15 mins later, i felt really bad being a bitch and msg him sorry. and his reply totally surprised me.

“no, you dont sound like a bitch. you still sound nice and sweet.. cos u are my sweetie. night dar.”

more tears flowed down my face, but this time it was tears of happiness. i am so touched by his msg, especially since it came from him (who usually is the very act cool, egoistic, doesnt show affection kinda guy) and it being so timely. i felt a little renewed and at ease, and it struck me why for so many years, why i stuck it out with him even though many thought other wise.

this morning, after my daily ritual of checking out jobstreet, i checked on the status of my applications. for the 11 jobs that i had applied for, i was considered for 5 and 1 was in process. now, is that considered good? at least it made me feel a lot better about myself this morning.

i can now begin my day with a smile.