some thoughts

prior to receiving the gifts, i practically had a sucky day.. ending my meeting at 8pm with loads of undone work and a friend waiting to have dinner with me since 6.45pm.

i felt really bad to have belle wait for me for so long. 🙁

i wonder if my life is a joke, and that if it isn’t hard enough, somehow.. i just have to face up to the tough situations and meet with totally unexpected surprises. with vday looming, i was somehow sad that i am gonna be alone this year, and it’s gonna be so far different from the last 7 years to have someone by my side.

i’m feeling kinda lost. and i just had to bump into him during lunch today. if that wasn’t bad enough, i sat beside him throughout my lunch and i couldn’t swallow my food at all. i just can’t wait to go because i felt so affected.

not seeing him makes life easier. seeing him makes it so much tougher for me to move on. even i acted nonchalant and quickly parted our ways (with a hungry stomach still!), i wasn’t feeling quite the same.

it’s really really hard. i wish i were more gutsy in handling the matter, but i just can’t stop thinking how he is now and how he would be spending vday..

somehow, the vday gifts that i received made me smile all over again. at least, there are people who appreciate me for who i am.. and show their affection through their small ways.

i feel blessed!