wee bit of sanity installed.

i was going crazy a couple of days back. the baby has been giving regular bouts of crankiness at specific intervals and timing and i figured, he’s colicky.

but while i have tried the usual ways to soothe a colicky baby (warm baths, massage, colic hold, and eventually, letting the baby cry out loud), my mother has been given me the stare for letting the baby cry and she cannot stand it but to come and carry (read: snatch) the baby up.

mad frustrating. like it helped matters, the baby still cried on anyway.

does not help that the husband decided not to do anything and went with the flow (i think he feels better with the baby OFF our hands and someone else decides to ‘relieve’ us of the baby) and just prepared to head off to slumber land.

it just didnt sit well with me. but no one stood on my side. everyone was giving me crap excuse like.. maybe he hungry (ello! he just drank), maybe he is not drinking enough (this shit again when the pd said he is overfed), maybe the pd the wrong and he needs more milk (great, people here all can be doctors already).

i think its sorta pushes me INTO DEPRESSION. i wanted to just die there and then.. and pack my bags and LEAVE THE HOUSE and dont give a damn f*ck to everyone and everything.

it was also upsetting to know.. when everyone else out there is not understanding, the husband isnt on my side. *sob* i could pardon everyone else who is not educated about babies, and pardon them because they were not at the pd visits… but the husband??! kill me please.

i was sobbing into the pillows and wondering why the hell is so hard, like i had to fight a lost battle myself and everyone else doesn’t seemed to bother or the least concerned.

the hubby eventually tried to soothe me because the wife was crying non stop, and yesterday, we popped out for a movie!

pirates of the caribbean. ooohhhh.. the mermaids!

wah. its been a long time.. i cannot even remember the last movie i watched. and guess what? i really appreciate the joys of bottle feeding. so free to get around and about without worrying about feeding the baby! hah!

i slept the entire day away today, and woke only to express my milk and crawl back to sleep. OMG. why am i soooooo tired?!